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[CCBC-Net] Bullying
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From: Mary Ann Gilpatrick <MGilpatrick>
Date: Fri, 21 Mar 2008 12:08:46 -0700
So, what do you do about the Dads who wear "Whoever dies with the most toys wins" shirts?? Not to mention, the "Track down the bluebird of happiness and kill it" shirts?? Or the "My kid beat up your honor student" bumper stickers??
All things are linked. School behavior does not come out of a vacuum.
Mary Ann Gilpatrick Walla Walla Public Library 238 E. Alder Walla Walla WA 99362 509-524-4435 mgilpatrick at ci.walla-walla.wa.us
What Denise said about her daughter's school and its zero tolerance to bullying, "Not that bullying doesn't ever happen, but it is DEALT with immediately, directly and compassionately for both the bullies and the bullied," really is the key: dealing with it at first sign to keep it from escalating to a point of no return. School is the testing ground for relationships and social order, so there needs to be an awareness that bullying happens and what everybody can do to try to stop it from getting out of control. No doubt that preventing and counteracting bullying is a very complex thing, but we must all do our best as families, as schools, as a culture. And anti-bullying practices need to be VERY carefully monitored, otherwise they take the risk of causing further damage.
"I am Jack" by Australia author Susanne Gervay (based on her son's experience of being bullied in school and unfortunately not published in the US) is a great book that shows the situation from the perspective of all involved. The book was endorsed by Life Education Australia and is extensively used in anti-bullying programs throughout the country.
On a more personal note, and to illustrate the complexity of the issue... I was seriously bullied during first and second grade by another girl, a classmate (supposedly a "good friend" and neighbor.) I never told anyone, for fear (and I mean F-E-AR) of what she might do, and no one ever interfered (or dare I say noticed?) The bullying didn't stop until SHE herself decided to stop it, two years later, just like that: "It's a Christmas gift for you," she said on a December morning, on the last day of the school year.
Looking back I am amazed by her awareness of what she had been doing. "Setting me free," as it turned out, was her ultimate display of control. The experience of being "released" by her was even more terrifying and humiliating than the bullying I endured those two years. She was being "so nice," she said, because she liked me a lot
(!!).
Aline
************************************************ Aline Pereira Managing Editor, PaperTigers Pacific Rim Voices 300 Third Street, #822 San Francisco, CA 94107
(415) 648-4528
PaperTigers - A colorful website devoted to young readers' books, with a special focus on the Pacific Rim and South Asia
PaperTigers Blog- Speaking of multicultural books for children and young adults
Visit our Pacific Rim Voices family of websites
************************************************
_______________________________________________ CCBC-Net mailing list CCBC-Net at ccbc.education.wisc.edu Visit this link to read archives or to unsubscribe... http://ccbc.education.wisc.edu/mailman/listinfo/ccbc-net
Received on Fri 21 Mar 2008 02:08:46 PM CDT
Date: Fri, 21 Mar 2008 12:08:46 -0700
So, what do you do about the Dads who wear "Whoever dies with the most toys wins" shirts?? Not to mention, the "Track down the bluebird of happiness and kill it" shirts?? Or the "My kid beat up your honor student" bumper stickers??
All things are linked. School behavior does not come out of a vacuum.
Mary Ann Gilpatrick Walla Walla Public Library 238 E. Alder Walla Walla WA 99362 509-524-4435 mgilpatrick at ci.walla-walla.wa.us
What Denise said about her daughter's school and its zero tolerance to bullying, "Not that bullying doesn't ever happen, but it is DEALT with immediately, directly and compassionately for both the bullies and the bullied," really is the key: dealing with it at first sign to keep it from escalating to a point of no return. School is the testing ground for relationships and social order, so there needs to be an awareness that bullying happens and what everybody can do to try to stop it from getting out of control. No doubt that preventing and counteracting bullying is a very complex thing, but we must all do our best as families, as schools, as a culture. And anti-bullying practices need to be VERY carefully monitored, otherwise they take the risk of causing further damage.
"I am Jack" by Australia author Susanne Gervay (based on her son's experience of being bullied in school and unfortunately not published in the US) is a great book that shows the situation from the perspective of all involved. The book was endorsed by Life Education Australia and is extensively used in anti-bullying programs throughout the country.
On a more personal note, and to illustrate the complexity of the issue... I was seriously bullied during first and second grade by another girl, a classmate (supposedly a "good friend" and neighbor.) I never told anyone, for fear (and I mean F-E-AR) of what she might do, and no one ever interfered (or dare I say noticed?) The bullying didn't stop until SHE herself decided to stop it, two years later, just like that: "It's a Christmas gift for you," she said on a December morning, on the last day of the school year.
Looking back I am amazed by her awareness of what she had been doing. "Setting me free," as it turned out, was her ultimate display of control. The experience of being "released" by her was even more terrifying and humiliating than the bullying I endured those two years. She was being "so nice," she said, because she liked me a lot
(!!).
Aline
************************************************ Aline Pereira Managing Editor, PaperTigers Pacific Rim Voices 300 Third Street, #822 San Francisco, CA 94107
(415) 648-4528
PaperTigers - A colorful website devoted to young readers' books, with a special focus on the Pacific Rim and South Asia
PaperTigers Blog- Speaking of multicultural books for children and young adults
Visit our Pacific Rim Voices family of websites
************************************************
_______________________________________________ CCBC-Net mailing list CCBC-Net at ccbc.education.wisc.edu Visit this link to read archives or to unsubscribe... http://ccbc.education.wisc.edu/mailman/listinfo/ccbc-net
Received on Fri 21 Mar 2008 02:08:46 PM CDT
