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From: Lisa Peters <lwpeters>
Date: Tue, 12 Jul 2005 10:11:32 -0500
Every sentence of Our Family Tree involved what seemed like a dozen decisions. This must be true for every writer and every text, but it was especially true for me and this particular book. For example:
Here's one line from the middle of the text:
When families of green plants and insects began living on the land, we followed them.
And here are some of the earlier drafts of that sentence:
Our ancestors crawled out of the sea and onto the land
As the first flowers appeared on the land, we changed again.
When green plants first grew on the continents, we followed them.
When green plants began growing on the continents, we followed them.
When green plants began growing on the land, we eventually followed them to eat bugs. (a paleontologist's suggestion)
When green plants, then bugs, brought life to the land, we followed them.
When families of green plants and insects began growing on the land, we followed them.
Some of the questions that came up: Should I say flowers or be more generic with the language? I decided against flowers because they came much later, and I wanted to capture the earlier point of life invading the land. Then a paleontologist pointed out that sure, green plants invaded the land, but it was primarily the insects that attracted our ancestors, so that information had to be added. I didn't want to leave out plants, because this evolutionary stage seemed too significant. Should I say
'bugs' or 'insects'? Bugs seemed a little too casual for this text. Then, it sounded funny to say that insects began growing, so the verb had to change. I added the word
'families' to start to introduce the idea to children that there are other groups of organisms on the earth, and they're just as significant to the history of life as ours. It was a subtle point, but I felt strongly about making it: we are one species among millions of successful species, we are one family among many successful families. But then what about the word family? It has a specific scientific meaning
(as in species, genus, family, order, etc.). Would scientists object to the use of it here with its more common meaning? I didn't want scientists to object to this book, but I decided in favor of keeping the word 'family' to lend warmth and poetry to the story. I decided scientists could use a little poetry in their lives!
Lisa Peters www.lisawestbergpeters.com
Received on Tue 12 Jul 2005 10:11:32 AM CDT
Date: Tue, 12 Jul 2005 10:11:32 -0500
Every sentence of Our Family Tree involved what seemed like a dozen decisions. This must be true for every writer and every text, but it was especially true for me and this particular book. For example:
Here's one line from the middle of the text:
When families of green plants and insects began living on the land, we followed them.
And here are some of the earlier drafts of that sentence:
Our ancestors crawled out of the sea and onto the land
As the first flowers appeared on the land, we changed again.
When green plants first grew on the continents, we followed them.
When green plants began growing on the continents, we followed them.
When green plants began growing on the land, we eventually followed them to eat bugs. (a paleontologist's suggestion)
When green plants, then bugs, brought life to the land, we followed them.
When families of green plants and insects began growing on the land, we followed them.
Some of the questions that came up: Should I say flowers or be more generic with the language? I decided against flowers because they came much later, and I wanted to capture the earlier point of life invading the land. Then a paleontologist pointed out that sure, green plants invaded the land, but it was primarily the insects that attracted our ancestors, so that information had to be added. I didn't want to leave out plants, because this evolutionary stage seemed too significant. Should I say
'bugs' or 'insects'? Bugs seemed a little too casual for this text. Then, it sounded funny to say that insects began growing, so the verb had to change. I added the word
'families' to start to introduce the idea to children that there are other groups of organisms on the earth, and they're just as significant to the history of life as ours. It was a subtle point, but I felt strongly about making it: we are one species among millions of successful species, we are one family among many successful families. But then what about the word family? It has a specific scientific meaning
(as in species, genus, family, order, etc.). Would scientists object to the use of it here with its more common meaning? I didn't want scientists to object to this book, but I decided in favor of keeping the word 'family' to lend warmth and poetry to the story. I decided scientists could use a little poetry in their lives!
Lisa Peters www.lisawestbergpeters.com
Received on Tue 12 Jul 2005 10:11:32 AM CDT
