CCBC-Net Archives
inexcusable
- Contemporary messages sorted: [ by date ] [ by subject ] [ by author ]
From: laura.kemp_at_att.net <laura.kemp>
Date: Sat, 30 Jul 2005 19:20:42 +0000
I find the idea in the quotes below that this is universal to men disturbing. I don't think all men have the same aggressiveness or lack of caring. I would be more comfortable with "we[a certain subset of men]...." or "we[potential rapists]..." or even
"we [cads]..."
I think some people see relationships as bartering agreements where each person gets something from the other, and sometimes will take more than agreed to. I think other people see relationships as honestly caring about and forming a bond with another pe rson. And this is true of both men and women. The man in the quotes below sounds like people I know who fit in the first group. I think they and may not even realize that there is a second group, or sees the second group as weak, stupid, and easily use d. What I don't think is that this is a male/female dichotomy. I know men and women in each group.
Laura Kemp www.livejournal.com/users/laurakemp
-------------- Original message from "Alina B. Klein" : --------------
The statistics, after all, are staggering: "1 in every 12 men admits to committing acts that meet legal definitions of rape"--(from "I Never Called it Rape--The Ms. Report on Recognizing, Fighting and Surviving Date and Acquaintance rape".)
In the same book quoted above, one man who was interviewed said this:
"I identified myself as an acquaintance rapist. I didn't knock anybody down, I didn't say: 'If you don't do this I'll twist your arm,'...but I can remember perfectly overpowering people in that persuasive way that we [men] do: We lay on top of you (the w oman) and you can't move. I can remember lying and creating all kinds of scenarios and never asking for consensual sex. You know, not caring what happens the next day or having that person feel uncomfortable or unsettled about what had happened."
The man quoted here went on to speak to many colleges and men's groups about this. He recognized and understood the "mythology and everything else that we [men] are all about." and began working to dispel it.
Received on Sat 30 Jul 2005 02:20:42 PM CDT
Date: Sat, 30 Jul 2005 19:20:42 +0000
I find the idea in the quotes below that this is universal to men disturbing. I don't think all men have the same aggressiveness or lack of caring. I would be more comfortable with "we[a certain subset of men]...." or "we[potential rapists]..." or even
"we [cads]..."
I think some people see relationships as bartering agreements where each person gets something from the other, and sometimes will take more than agreed to. I think other people see relationships as honestly caring about and forming a bond with another pe rson. And this is true of both men and women. The man in the quotes below sounds like people I know who fit in the first group. I think they and may not even realize that there is a second group, or sees the second group as weak, stupid, and easily use d. What I don't think is that this is a male/female dichotomy. I know men and women in each group.
Laura Kemp www.livejournal.com/users/laurakemp
-------------- Original message from "Alina B. Klein" : --------------
The statistics, after all, are staggering: "1 in every 12 men admits to committing acts that meet legal definitions of rape"--(from "I Never Called it Rape--The Ms. Report on Recognizing, Fighting and Surviving Date and Acquaintance rape".)
In the same book quoted above, one man who was interviewed said this:
"I identified myself as an acquaintance rapist. I didn't knock anybody down, I didn't say: 'If you don't do this I'll twist your arm,'...but I can remember perfectly overpowering people in that persuasive way that we [men] do: We lay on top of you (the w oman) and you can't move. I can remember lying and creating all kinds of scenarios and never asking for consensual sex. You know, not caring what happens the next day or having that person feel uncomfortable or unsettled about what had happened."
The man quoted here went on to speak to many colleges and men's groups about this. He recognized and understood the "mythology and everything else that we [men] are all about." and began working to dispel it.
Received on Sat 30 Jul 2005 02:20:42 PM CDT
